Happy Birthday Harris Malden

"Harris Malden has a secret. He fakes his facial hair."

Harris Malden wears his insecurity on his face in a curious disguise for everyone to see. No one in the neighborhood, not even his best friend Paul or his brother Melvin, has the heart to tell him how ridiculous he looks with the thick black line above his lip. Harris Malden fakes his facial hair, and as far as he's concerned, nobody can tell.